Supporting a Colleague on the Anniversary of a Loved one’s Death

The anniversary of a loved one’s death can be an emotionally challenging day for anyone, including in the workplace. Recognising this anniversary and offering support can make a world of difference to a colleague, helping them feel valued and understood while they navigate a difficult day. Here’s some examples of how workplaces can provide meaningful support to a colleague on this important, and often sensitive,  occasion. 

1. Acknowledge the Day Respectfully 

Sometimes, a simple acknowledgement is one of the most supportive things you can do.  Whether it’s a quiet word, a thoughtful message, or a simple card, recognising the day is coming up can let your colleague know they aren’t alone. If you’re a manager, consider taking a moment to check in with them privately. Avoid grand gestures, as the goal is to be thoughtful and considerate of their feelings. 

2. Encourage Flexible Time Off 

Everyone grieves differently, and some may find it particularly hard to focus on work around this time. Consider offering a flexible schedule or even time off to honour the day in their own way. Having the option to work from home or take a personal day gives them the space they might need. This small gesture shows understanding and allows them to process the day’s emotions in a way that suits them best. 

3. Create a Supportive Environment 

Fostering an environment of compassion and openness around grief and loss can help a colleague feel safe in expressing their feelings. Remind employees that mental health resources are available and encourage them to talk openly with managers if they need additional support. A simple acknowledgement during team meetings that bereavement is a part of life can contribute to a culture where everyone feels comfortable expressing themselves. It should be a common line of discussion included in staff wellbeing. 

4. Offer Access to Bereavement Resources 

Providing access to resources like counselling services, support groups, or bereavement advocates can be invaluable. Even a list of local support groups or online resources can make a significant difference. If your organisation has an Employee Assistance Program (EAP), gently remind the colleague that these services are available to them. This reminder can be a caring way to offer help without pressure. 

5. Check in After the Anniversary

Grieving is not limited to a single day. Check in with your colleague after the anniversary and let them know you’re there if they need anything. This small gesture reinforces that their well-being is a priority and that the support isn’t limited to one specific date. 

6. Encourage Team Sensitivity 

Letting team members know about the anniversary (with the colleague’s permission) can help them be more sensitive and understanding. A simple heads-up allows the team to offer quiet support, avoid potentially triggering topics, and approach their colleague with greater compassion that day. 

7. Empathise but Respect Boundaries 

Some people may want to talk about their loved one, while others may prefer to keep their feelings private. Let your colleague take the lead on how much they share.  Sometimes, just letting them know that you’re there to listen if they want to talk can be comforting without being intrusive. Often people like to share happy memories about there loved one and offering them the chance to do this can be helpful. 

8. Consider Rituals or Memorials (If Appropriate)

If your colleague feels comfortable, offering a simple way to honour their loved one at work such as lighting a candle, bringing in flowers, or even bringing in a favourite food can provide a sense of peace and connection. This can be particularly comforting in workplaces where colleagues may have known the family member who passed or where the team shares a close bond. 

Why Supporting Colleagues Through Grief Matters 

Supporting employees on challenging days, like the anniversary of a loved one’s death,  isn’t just about being compassionate it’s also about fostering a workplace culture where people feel valued and seen. Grief can be isolating, but a workplace that extends understanding and care can make a difficult time a little less lonely, helping colleagues return to work with renewed resilience and a deeper sense of connection. 

While each person’s grief journey is unique, these supportive actions show that your workplace is one where empathy and care come first. By being mindful of their needs and creating a compassionate environment, you help build a workplace where employees feel understood, supported, and ready to face the challenges that come their way even leading up to or on the hardest days. 

For further guidance on supporting colleagues in the workplace please visit www.workplacebereavement.co.uk for information.